Persuasion Paper :: essays research papers

matting B2/14/05PY129Persuasion PaperHello, woman who sits in the front of the class. I may not open your name, but I do have some unfortunate news for you. You should never go out with me. We all know it would have happened. Everybody knows whats on a womans mind, and how could I not notice things homogeneous the itinerary you stare at me in class, its just so distracting. Im just trying to stop this very attractive paradox before its too late. This paper will save you from days of therapy and gallons of Ben and Jerrys cookie dough. Dont feel bad, its not you, well actually it is but you can still choose from the new(prenominal) 10 guys in our class who mysteriously all sit in a circle around you I just dont think things would work out between us. I believe that I have a pretty good idea of what material body of a person you are from being in your logic class and never talking to you once. Our close and personal relationship gives me insight to who you are, and why we arent right for each other. First, your too predictable and boring for me, second, your not involuntary to neuter, and third, I dont think you could satisfy me.Variety is the modify of life Mix things up a bit. You sit in the resembling seat every day, who does this? Dont you ever wonder what it feels like to sit someplace else? I wouldnt be able to stomach that kind of compliancy. Another testament to your predictability, is the fact that you never have a story to tell about how your weekend was. This means either integrity of two things. 1) You do nothing on weekends. Your idea of fun is watching the Lifetime channel. You go to Six Flags and enjoy such rides as Teacups, Ferris wheel, and fouled bench by the hotdog stand.2) Just the opposite. Maybe you frequent S&M clubs or rob orphans on the weekends. Whatever it is, it probably makes the bollix Jesus cry. You disgust me.So start enjoying the finer, more fun things in life. Until then, though, I just dont think your ready for my kind of excitement.You most likely do a variety of things, or have some qualities that are unattractive to me, and you are also unwilling to change them. I know this because of our many interactions together, where you have revealed to me your deepest secrets and habits.